It's only words

I like words, they’re terribly interesting...

I’ve been playing with an online database at www.wordcount.org. Wordcount shows you the 86,800 most frequently used words in English; the list comes from books, magazines and internet articles (100 million written words) scanned and counted to produce a frequency of occurrence. The word “the” is ranked number 1 and the word “conquistador” (surprisingly) is number 86,800.

When you search for a word the website allows you to scroll left or right to see the next less popular (or more popular) “twin word”.

My thought was that this would be a neat way to create new “rock star names” in a similar way to the “80’s porn star name game”, but using more technology. For the uninitiated the 80’s porn star game goes like this - The name of your first pet becomes your new first name and your mothers maiden name becomes your second name - mine is a rather dull – Keo Hutcheson. Lets have yours in the comments please.
Using my wordcount “twin word rock star name” rules you keep your first name and twin it with the next less popular word as your second name.

If not for a very spooky “sign” in the twin word game, I would have given up and not posted this. Naturally the first name I tried was “Mark”. I am ranked 789th in popularity (at least my name is) and my twin word at 790th, is the abbreviation St (for street or more probably and appropriately, “Saint”). This rather boringly gives my Rock Star Name as “Mark St” – which doesn’t even sound like a name but could be a shortening of Markster, as in “The Markster” I suppose?

Despite that fairly limp start I was not completely discouraged and looked for more.

Searching for Dave gives us a ranking of 3,460th, with 3,461st being the word “Penalty” so we get “Dave Penalty”. Not exactly gold dust yet so I tried the un-abbreviated David.

At 619 & 620 we get “David Final”.
266 & 267 produces “John Enough” which is slightly more amusing while 2,400 & 2,401 gives us “Graham Struck” - I’m not sure what to make of that. However 796 & 797 are “Peter Serious”, very apt in a knowing reverse irony sort of way.

But! extraordinarily at ranking 2,316 & 2,317 are the words “Steve “and “Stick” Doesn’t that send a numerological, other worldly shudder down your spine? There, written in the mass of 100 million words is the absolute pre-ordained rock name of our skin damaging, finger blistering drummer (well very nearly anyway).

Ranking at 1,406 & 1,407 is “Dad Somebody”
With 3,638 & 3,639 giving “Dancing Bathroom”
So we can double twin to “Somebody Bathroom” or better still, twist the rules and have “Bathroom Dancing” (a kind of secret version of Dad Dancing performed with Soap on a Rope). I really think we need to write a song called Bathroom Dancing (subtitle Soap on a Rope).

Working backwards from the word “Cheese” at 3,542, gives us some truly useful advice in a stark warning against the hazards of competitive band syndrome:
“Rival improving risks cheese”

Now I’ve finished, I’m not sure why I wanted to share any of that with you – so here is the latest video instead.



PS - the most cryptic word play in this video is a type of frost